Year 29: Trip to the Antiques Faire (Irony Intended)

I can clearly remember turning 11 and thinking, "Holy crud balls, I'm old." I haven't really liked my birthday ever since. But, this year, something happened. I decided to celebrate, really celebrate, getting older (29, boo-yah!) After all, what's the POINT (you'll see the pun in a minute) of getting older if you're not going to offer up a high-five to being alive? Plus, the Alameda POINT Antiques Faire fatefully happened to coincide with my birthday this year. So, two car loads of amazing ladies made a 6 am wake up call (that's 6 am in the morning) and journeyed all the way up to Alameda for some shopping, eating, and treasure finding. Look at these awesome early risers!

 The fair is exclusively for things over twenty years old...but they still let Lo in :)

 I was so excited to get to spend the day with KD (a bestie since college days)!

I couldn't stop taking pictures of all these amazing finds...

 

 I'm still kicking myself for not buying this button

 Look what KD bought.

 This could be a piece of modern poetry:

 I was posing with this and feeling like a total dork, when a guy shouted, "You look like her!"

 And I was like, "Happy Birthday to me!"

Sponges & Silver

 Look what JKL spotted...

Confession: I have never met a hat that I didn't want on my head

I don't even know what these are, but I WANT them

 Lo and behold, Lo bought a ring!

 

 When I have a huge loft (or am living under a bridge), I am buying this Hollywood Video sign and putting it on one big white wall...

 Lunch break, where in we eat EVERYTHING! Roberta (on the right) was such a doll! Not only was she our antique show guide & driver, she also told me, "You are going to have an incredible year. 29 is the best." LOVE HER.

 Post lunch pow-wow to decide where to go next

I bought myself a necklace as a present. I lurve it.

 We'd been eying these popsicles all day. JKL treated me to a sea salted dark chocolate from Pop Nation...it was like the Audrey Hepburn of fudgsicles and I mean that in a good way!

My incredible Auntie Anne got me the best present ever...this cookie from Feel Good Bakery which was insane and wall to wall with walnuts :)

 Still, can't believe I'm 29. I'm practically an antique, but I've always liked antiques. So here's to 29, something I can definitely celebrate.

We Didn't Start the Fire: Butt Lake 2012

There are certain places in this world that are special and if you're lucky, really lucky, you get to know these places, spend time with them, see them as so much more than a dot on a map. Butt Lake is one of those places for a lot of people. I've written about it before (Essential Butt Rules of Camping & How to Be Camping Chic) but every summer for the past fifty years my family of friends has traveled to Butt Lake to spend two magical weeks together.

I always joke that I want all my nearest and dearest to live on the same street and for two weeks out of the year I get my wish. I get to wake up next door to my cousins. I get to see friends I've known since before I was a redhead :) I get to have breakfast with my grandpa, joke with my uncles, and make dinner with a troop of "aunts." But, most importantly, when I'm at the lake I get to be with a roving pack of the most lovable wackadoos it's ever been my pleasure to get into countless shenanigans with.

This year was a very different Butt Lake because of the Chips fire and no, to quote the song, we didn't start the fire. We were evacuated from our campgrounds in early August and as we drove away we hoped that our Butt Lake would stay un-charbroiled. Unfortunately, recent reports say that our home away from home was not so lucky. When I heard the news, I'll be honest- I cried. My heart broke for the people of Chester (the nearby town) and it broke for what has been lost. But, then I realized something. It's not really the lake that I go for (don't get me wrong, it's beautiful and I love it), but that's not what makes it special. It's the people and the memories that make it magic and hey, magic always has a way of making a comeback. So, no matter what, our wild rumpus will continue- crazy hats, inner tubes, and all. Here's to Butt Lake 2013.

I'd Marry this Movie: Defending Your Life

Albert Brooks' Defending Your Life: there's a fair to middling chance that I may be obsessed with this movie. It's your typical "boy gets hit by a bus, goes to limbo, meets a girl, eats all the food he wants" story and did I mention, it has Meryl Streep it in? Because it does. Meryl frickin' Streep is in this movie and she is funny and she is delightful, and she glows like a thespian-Botticelli. What can I say? It's an existential romance and every time I think about it I put my hand on my chin and sigh.

Here are the reasons you should watch/marry it:
1) Daniel Miller dies on his birthday when he is hit by bus while listening to Barbra Streisand's "Something's Coming"(I'm in love with this movie already)
2) He ends up in an afterlife where he learns that he will have to go on trial to "defend" his life (cue the obligatory referencing to the title)
3) In this afterlife, people can eat all the food they want and never get fat or feel stuffed and the food is the best food you've ever had (hello, every fantasy I've ever had)
4) All the people being judged wear tupas (essentially mumus but with flattering belts)
5) Shirley Maclaine makes a cameo and it is the best cameo in the history of cameos
6) Rip Torn, Rip Torn, Rip Torn
7) It gives meaning to my life
This movie is sweet, smart, and funny and did I mention it has Meryl Streep in it?

(via youtube)

Meryl Streep eats a corndog. Can it get any better?

The Cost of Rape Jokes

The Cost of Rape Jokes

Recently, comedian Daniel Tosh made a rape joke. It’s been in the news. You might have heard about it. I know I did. He’s apologized. Why the big hullabuloo? It’s partly because he made the joke, but, more importantly people laughed.

I have never heard a joke about rape that was funny. Never. You know why? Because rape is not funny. It’s just not. I wish it was. I wish it was the kind of thing that a victim could forget or that the sheer ridiculousness of forcing someone to have sex would appear so absurd that to even hear of such behavior would make you go “say, huh?” But, the truth is that 1 out of 3 women in the world will be forced to have sex, or be beaten, or brutalized, or yes, gang banged. That being said, I think comedians can and should be allowed to say whatever the heck they want, but then again, I think any person should always feel free to be an idiot (it makes me look smarter). It’s your right to be jerk. But, don’t, I repeat DO NOT expect me to laugh. Because my laugh is my vote. It’s my saying, “it’s alright and I know what you mean.” And I don’t know what any rape joke means except that violence against women (or men for that matter) is acceptable. It’s not.

So, here is what I propose. You want to tell a rape joke? Sure, go ahead. But, first take out your check book and write a donation to your local YWCA Rape Crisis Center(a foundation which offers counseling and support to survivors of sexual assault and their families). Figure out how much that joke is worth to you. $5- great. Now, take that figure and multiply it by every audience member who is listening to your hate speech. 200 audience members. Great, that’s $1,000. $1,000 that can go to buy blankets, tooth brushes, tee-shirts, fresh underwear for survivors of rape who sit in emergency rooms across the United States and have just had to turn in all their clothes as evidence. 

You want to laugh at a rape joke. Please feel free. But first, you might want to stop by the ATM. That’ll be $5 for a snicker, $20 for a laugh, and $100 for a guffaw (slap your knee & that’s an extra $10, and clap, well, that’ll be $50 more). 

Laughter is the most powerful tool/weapon/eye opener in the world. Rape is absurd. Make fun of the ridiculousness that we live in a world that might ever perceive a short skirt as an invitation, a passed out woman as a “good” date, or a vagina as a punchline. But, never make the mistake of portraying rape as ok. So, in closing:

“Knock, knock.”

“Who’s there?”

“Don’t tell rape jokes. Donate to the YWCA.”

Signature Drink: The Librarian's Bender

Here it is. My personal cocktail: the "Librarian's Bender." I like to sip it while listening to jazz and reading overdue library books. But, really it's a go-anywhere beverage with a carefree spirit and it pairs well with chicken strips.

Soup Eyre

There are only two things in life that can make me swoon: (1) Michael Fassbender (2) challah bread. So, Tuesday night I lived the dream.

I call my dinner "modular grilled cheese." I never got around to actually cooking the thing, but who doesn't like a healthy side of cheese next to their bread and butter? Because sometimes it's just too hard to grill cheese and dream of being Mrs. Maren Fassbender all at the same time- (insert swoon)

Why I Should Never Have "Free Time"

I am not allowed...

-to make a giant skillet cookie 
-to "discover" etsy and rhinestones in the same evening
-to watch 6 back-to-back episodes of BBC's Miss Marple Murder Mysteries

because...

I am now a sugar-high, soon to be blinged out, paranoid mess...